A heated debate is unfolding on social media, particularly on TikTok, about a controversial topic: whether a mother would choose to save her own life or her baby’s life if faced with complications during childbirth. This discussion has sparked intense reactions, especially among women.
The debate gained momentum after Anabel Morales shared a viral video on TikTok. In the video, she addressed her husband with a heartfelt message:
“To my husband: If I’m giving birth, and the doctor says you need to pick between me or the baby. Please save me. I don’t want Ethan to grow up without a mom, & I don’t want you to have to raise two babies alone while also grieving your wife,” Morales stated.
This video has resonated with many mothers, including myself. The idea of leaving behind children to be raised by a grieving father seems unbearable to some. However, others feel the opposite, as they cannot fathom living without their child. Morales's video has garnered 6.6 million views and over half a million likes, highlighting the depth of the debate.
One commenter shared a poignant perspective: “My mom sadly passed away because it was either me or her. But no one understands how hard it was for me and my dad. Having him raise me alone and growing up without a mom was incredibly difficult. So I would choose myself, no matter how forced I am to choose the baby. I don’t want the baby to go through what I did. It’s heartbreaking.”
This personal story adds a layer of complexity to the discussion. The U.S. has a higher pregnancy mortality rate compared to other developed countries. According to 2018 CDC data, the rate among white non-Hispanic individuals is 13.7 deaths per 100,000 births. For Indigenous and Black people, the rates are significantly higher, at 26.5 and 41.4 deaths per 100,000 births, respectively.
Another comment echoed a shift in perspective: “I used to say save the baby, not me. Now that I have a daughter, I think so differently.”
Similarly, someone else shared their struggle: “I had these feelings during my third pregnancy and felt so guilty. I’m glad I’m not the only one who feels this way.”
Conversely, many individuals have expressed that they would choose to save their baby. While some have voiced their opinions with sensitivity, the underlying sentiment remains clear.
Ultimately, the choice between saving oneself or the baby is deeply personal. It's a difficult topic to discuss in hopes that such a decision will never need to be made. In reality, when faced with such a choice, the situation is heartbreaking and no decision can alleviate the inevitable grief.